WHY YOU SHOULD COME TO MY "HOUSEMATE's AWAY!" PARTY

1. Because China is becoming the next world superpower, so you should hang out with Asians more - to learn Chinese, to eat rice, to laugh at their button noses.

2. Because if Pirates of the Carribean 3 depicts Singapore as pirate-infested with Chow Yunn Fatt as the lecherous pirate lord, you must come to a Singaporean's (rented) Lair.

3. Because people who come will have a chance to get pirate loot bags. Or goodie bags, or doggy bags, however you call it. Trea...sure. Aye?

4. Because it's really easy to go to Kew East from the city. Take tram 48 from Flinders/Swanston Street, or bus 207 from Lonsdale/Swanston Street. Sailing time is a mere half an hour, with 2 mins of walking time from alight point to doorstep.

5. Because it's winter and Jenny is going to cook steamboat!!! You can also name any Chinese dish and Jenny will ATTEMPT to cook it for your gastronomic pleasure. While you dig in, choir-trained Jenny can also sing a song for you.

6. Because you can bring your own music, partners, animals, potblesses, movies or sudoku puzzles. Beer in all kinds of containers will be provided. BYO, or ROTFLOL, mate.

7. Because for RMIT students, the first semester of the graduate diploma in journalism is finally OVER! This made us pull our hair out from writer's block, and cry tears of frustration. Now, if only tears can cure cancer.

8. Because Jen is alone in Melby with all her folks 6000km away, and is dying to practise some aussie lingo in trade with Firefly galactic phrases.

Avast, and Adios!